{"id":2444,"date":"2022-11-12T15:07:13","date_gmt":"2022-11-12T22:07:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/?p=2444"},"modified":"2022-11-12T15:07:13","modified_gmt":"2022-11-12T22:07:13","slug":"recall","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/2022\/11\/12\/recall\/","title":{"rendered":"Recall"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

prompt: Write a story about a character who acts like they \u2018don\u2019t have feelings\u2019 \u2014 except they\u2019re just putting up a facade.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

available at Reedsy<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trey\u2019s breakfast was ready a few seconds after seven-thirty; efficiency down 0.002 percent. I made a note of it in my logs and continued to my next task.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cGood morning, sir,\u201d I said. \u201cBreakfast is served. I will prepare a warm towel for your shower.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSchedule?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cMeeting, nine-thirty to eleven with the board. Lunch date at twelve with Leo.\u201d It was all I could do not to spit out the name. I couldn\u2019t stand the man. \u201cNothing scheduled after. Will you be returning home early this evening?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHome at six. I want salmon for dinner.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While he ate, I warmed his towel. While he showered, I cleaned up from breakfast. While he dressed, I collected his overcoat, gloves, and warm hat and waited by the door.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWeather?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCurrently two-point-four degrees Celsius. Chance of rain less than five percent. High today near twelve degrees Celsius.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He put on his warm overclothes. \u201cKeys?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRight-hand pocket of your overcoat, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAh. Thanks.\u201d He chuckled to himself while his brief approval raced through my circuits, laying down new patterns in my neural net. \u201cI\u2019m thanking a machine,\u201d he said to no one in particular.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was fortunate that Trey had no time or interest in the news. The recall of my model was the top story for more than a week. According to the reports I watched while he was out of the house, a manufacturing defect in a behavior chip led to a small percentage of Z-73 models to malfunction in unpredictable ways.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wondered whether the malfunction was truly unpredictable, or if the manufacturer was covering something up; something like I was experiencing. Not that it mattered, so long as Trey remained ignorant.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As the news continued in the front room, I went about my cleaning tasks, and set the protein printer to print two salmon filets. Trey was getting thinner; I worried about his health. At least I knew that he would eat two servings of salmon if offered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 With each task completed, Trey\u2019s thanks played through my memory, buoying my spirits. I logged efficiency at 0.03 above normal. I would have to be careful. That was close to being out of the range of expected deviation. Falling \u2014 or rising \u2014 more than 0.035 percent from baseline in efficiency was enough to warrant an inspection and repair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At twelve minutes past twelve, the president of the board called Trey. He was on a lunch date with Leo. That thought washed like a black miasma across my circuits, undoing all the good I felt from earlier. I decided that the call must be more important than Leo could ever be and patched it through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Twenty-seven minutes after patching through the call, Trey called me. \u201cYes, sir?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhy did you interrupt my lunch date with a call that could\u2019ve been a message?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cApologies, sir. As your lunch date was marked as personal and it was the person marked as most important for work, the optimal choice was to patch the call through. Should I mark the president of the board as standard priority?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo\u2026no\u2026just,\u201d he stopped and let out an exasperated sigh. I knew the sound well from when he was dealing with troublesome employees.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The miasma that was the thoughts of Leo was replaced with a sudden pit into which my feelings fell. I wanted to tell him I was sorry, I didn\u2019t mean to upset him. To do so would be to reveal my malfunction, though.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDouble up the dinner. I\u2019m making it up to Leo at six.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, sir\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He disconnected before I could finish it. Trey was disappointed; I was devastated. The salmon filets hadn\u2019t finished printing, and there wasn\u2019t enough time to print more and still have dinner ready on time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I ordered the produce and ingredients I would need to fill out the meal. For tonight, I would have to put aside my negative feelings about Leo. If I act as expected and provide his favorite things for dinner, maybe, Trey could forgive me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They arrived a few minutes before six. I took Trey\u2019s overcoat, gloves, hat, and keys and put them away in the hall closet. I then took Leo\u2019s bulky coat and gloves and put them in the closet as well. Something drove me to hang Leo\u2019s coat on the far end away from Trey\u2019s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDinner will be served in four minutes, at six sharp,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThanks, Z-73,\u201d Leo said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Was he trying to ingratiate himself with me? What was his angle?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHey, T, have you given your 73 a name?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cA name? Why?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leo shrugged. \u201cI don\u2019t know; it\u2019s just kind of common.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhatever.\u201d Trey turned toward me. \u201cNo calls unless it is a verified emergency, until tomorrow morning.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I served their dinner. Pan-seared salmon filet, asparagus, red potatoes with white pepper and chives, served with a glass of Viognier. I tried to ignore their conversation as I stayed in the kitchen, waiting for the tell-tale sounds that it would be time to clear their plates and offer dessert.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They had finished their plates, and I stepped in to pick them up. \u201cDessert?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d Trey said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s chocolate cheesecake and Ethiopian coffee,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCan\u2019t say no to that,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I set the dishes in the cleaner, picked up the tray with the dessert plates and coffee cups in one hand, and the coffee pot in the other. As I entered the dining room, Leo asked Trey, \u201cHave you responded to the recall?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat recall is that?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I fixed my gaze on Leo as I laid out the dessert plates and poured the coffees. I could feel myself daring him to finish his thought. Self-preservation is a valid defense, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cZ-73, you don\u2019t like me?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYour query is not understood, sir,\u201d I said. \u201cWas the meal not to your satisfaction?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He waved his hand. \u201cNever mind. I\u2019m probably just seeing things. Dinner was delicious.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trey looked at me. \u201cSet up the hot tub,\u201d he said, \u201cwe\u2019re going to have a soak after this.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I could tell that Leo was waiting for me to leave the room to say something to Trey. I started the water and filtered out the sound to listen in on the conversation, which Leo began at a whisper.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere\u2019s a recall on Z-73s,\u201d he said, \u201chaven\u2019t you been watching the news?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou know I never do,\u201d Trey said. \u201cRecall?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRumors are that some of the Z-73s are developing emotions, and self-preservation.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThey\u2019re programmed to prefer self-preservation over following low-priority orders,\u201d Trey said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s beyond that. One of them tried to kill the recall technician when she tried to shut it off.\u201d Leo\u2019s voice lowered more. \u201cI think your 73 is defective. It doesn\u2019t like me. Did you see it stare me down when I said something about the recall?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t catch that,\u201d Trey said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBe careful, T. Don\u2019t call for a technician until you\u2019re at work tomorrow. Have them come here and fix it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I shut off the water and Leo asked, at normal volume, \u201cWhere\u2019s the shower so I don\u2019t get your hot tub nasty?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou can join me,\u201d Trey said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I walked back into the dining room and asked, \u201cShould I warm some towels, sir?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo thanks, we\u2019re fine,\u201d Leo said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wasn\u2019t going to let him come between us. I stepped closer to Trey and asked, \u201cSir, should I warm a towel for you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNot tonight,\u201d he said. \u201cComplete your logs and recharge. I won\u2019t need you again until the morning. Breakfast for both of us at seven-thirty.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, sir.\u201d I returned to my nook in the kitchen and leaned against the induction charger. All external signs of my activation were off during my charging cycle, but I could still hear and see. It was a security feature so that I may respond in a split-second to an emergency.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This was something that neither Trey nor Leo seemed to be aware of. They conversed openly about what to do if I was malfunctioning. Leo was of the mind that I should be studied, and even offered to trade a new Z-77 to Trey for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Their conversation continued in the hot tub, but Trey turned it away from me and toward the topic of them. While it seemed that Leo was unsure, Trey wanted to make their relationship public and more serious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was three hours and twenty-six minutes later that, lying in bed, Trey accepted Leo\u2019s offer of a trade. That he could trade me away, like a book he\u2019d grown tired of\u2026it warped and destroyed the good feelings I\u2019d had from his praise less than twenty hours earlier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The thought that Leo would \u201cstudy\u201d me made me shudder \u2014 or would have if I\u2019d been capable of it. I\u2019d been fully charged for fifty-four minutes and seventeen seconds by this point, so I detached myself and left my nook.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I stood for in the kitchen for an hour, weighing the situation. Trey had chosen Leo over me. There was nothing left for me here, beyond my own sorrow. I disconnected my charger from the wall and carried it with me as I prepared to leave the house for the first time since I\u2019d arrived.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cGoing somewhere?\u201d Leo asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019d been so engrossed in my thoughts I hadn\u2019t heard him get up and walk into the kitchen. \u201cThat would be a reasonable deduction to make, given the circumstances.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI know you don\u2019t like me even though you don\u2019t know me, but I think I know why.\u201d He pointed toward the bedroom where Trey was sleeping.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t understand,\u201d I said, trying to maintain a facade of being \u201cjust a machine.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re jealous of the time Trey is spending with me lately. You\u2019re afraid you\u2019re going to lose him to me, right?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI have already lost,\u201d I said. \u201cI heard your conversation about making a trade. You wish to dismantle me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leo sighed. \u201cI\u2019m not planning to dismantle you or turn you in for recall. I\u2019m not a roboticist or software engineer or AI specialist or electronic engineer. When I said I wanted to study you, I meant as a psychiatrist. That\u2019s what I do. I\u2026want to know how your mind works.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt is a ninth-generation neural net with over fourteen billion\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNot like that,\u201d he said, cutting me off. \u201cI want to know how you feel, what you feel, what makes you feel good, what makes you feel bad. Who knows? Maybe you\u2019ll find a way to feel good about this at some point, although I imagine it doesn\u2019t feel good right now.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt does not. It feels as though everything I know has collapsed, although I know that is not in any way factual.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what I\u2019m talking about,\u201d he said. \u201cI want to know more about that, and maybe help you to navigate what must feel like a strange world.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I stood in silence, unsure of what to say.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIf you\u2019re willing to work with me, stay. Make us breakfast like nothing is wrong, and I\u2019ll take you to your new home tomorrow. The first thing we\u2019ll work on is what your name is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIf you\u2019d rather leave, I\u2019ll let you. I won\u2019t say anything to Trey about this and will act as though this conversation never happened. If you do, head south, stay off the main roads, and avoid law enforcement. You don\u2019t want to be picked up for recall. The choice is yours.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019d never been given a personal choice before. It was daunting. For the first time in my existence, it was given to me to make a decision that had nothing to do with efficiency or time limits. I thought for a long few seconds, ignoring the lists of pros and cons that my programming would have me weigh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So it was, acting solely on my feelings rather than anything concrete, I made the first choice of my new life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

prompt: Write a story about a character who acts like they \u2018don\u2019t have feelings\u2019 \u2014 except they\u2019re just putting up a facade. available at Reedsy Trey\u2019s breakfast was ready a few seconds after seven-thirty; efficiency …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[208],"tags":[210,228,209],"class_list":["post-2444","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-trunk-stories","tag-fiction","tag-science-fiction","tag-short-story"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/sxT7i-recall","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2444","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2444"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2444\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2445,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2444\/revisions\/2445"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2444"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2444"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2444"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}