{"id":2833,"date":"2025-12-15T17:43:17","date_gmt":"2025-12-16T00:43:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/?p=2833"},"modified":"2025-12-15T17:43:17","modified_gmt":"2025-12-16T00:43:17","slug":"gormund-and-the-tiny-pies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/2025\/12\/15\/gormund-and-the-tiny-pies\/","title":{"rendered":"Gormund and the Tiny Pies"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

prompt: Start or end your story with an empty plate, empty glass, or something burning.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

available at Reedsy<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The plate in front of Gormund gave him a feeling he hadn\u2019t had before. The squash and rashers were gone, and he\u2019d sopped up all the juices with bread. Now there was just the bare plate where there had been a beautiful, if plain, dinner. He wasn\u2019t sure why, but he felt a lot like the plate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He washed his plate and fork in the wash basin in his cabin and put them back in their place in the padded cabinet. It was turning out to be a lot of work to own a ship, even when he wasn\u2019t the sailing captain. Decisions other than how to deploy sails, when to row, and when to anchor, all fell to Gormund.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A knock on his cabin door was followed by the \u201cship\u2019s boy\u201d poking her head in the door. \u201cSir \u2026 uh Gormund \u2026 we\u2019ve spotted land where the maps show nothing. Captain wants to know if we go ashore or continue around.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI would like to see,\u201d Gormund said. He followed the lass to the deck where Sailing Captain Mikka waited. The sailing captain was short and wiry, with overly large canines in a dun face. Rumors said he was one-fourth ogre, and stronger than any man. Gormund wasn\u2019t sure about that, but he had seen Mikka lifting full barrels of water with more ease than he himself could.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The island didn\u2019t look much different from the land he\u2019d left behind in the east, with the exception of being smaller. The same sorts of trees and shrubs as along the coast they\u2019d left behind many days earlier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The sun was low over the hills of the island and seemed to be setting right there<\/em>. \u201cCan we wait a few minutes to decide?\u201d he asked the sailing captain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAye, Gormund,\u201d the captain replied, \u201cwe\u2019ve plenty of time to watch the sunset.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They watched the sun set behind the hills of the island and Gormund nodded. \u201cI think we should check the island.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAye. We\u2019re bound to find fresh water. It\u2019s the right time of year for kumquats, too, assuming there are any on the island.\u201d Mikka held out the looking glass that Gormund had gotten as part of the same table stakes that won him the ship. \u201cIt\u2019s a bit dark for my eyes, but you might be able to spot a good place to make landfall.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund shook his head. \u201cI\u2019m no good at that. That\u2019s why you\u2019re the sailing captain.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cFair enough. We\u2019ll stay put here for the night and make landfall in the morning.\u201d Mikka began shouting orders and Gormund watched as the sails were stowed and the anchor dropped. In a matter of minutes, the ship was stopped and ready for a quiet night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund wasn\u2019t awfully tired, but he thought he might turn in until there was a cry from the crow\u2019s nest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDragon! Dragon coming!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mikka pointed the looking glass to the eastern sky where the lookout was pointing, then handed the glass to Gormund. Gormund looked through the glass for a few seconds and smiled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When he put the glass down, he saw that the crew were readying weapons. \u201cNo!\u201d he yelled. \u201cThat\u2019s Elodie. She\u2019s a friend.\u201d Gormund stood in the middle of the deck and waved his hands over his head as the dragon circled, then skimmed the water to come to a stop next to the ship. She floated there in the ocean the same way a duck might in a pond.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHi, Elodie.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHello, Gormund.\u201d She carefully lowered her wing where someone was nestled along her side. \u201cI\u2019m afraid I went too high again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cLidia!\u201d Gormund leapt over the side of the ship, landing in a roll on Elodie\u2019s outstretched wing. He picked up the unconscious orc woman and carried her over his shoulder to climb the rope ladder the crew dropped after him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cShe wouldn\u2019t leave me alone,\u201d Elodie said. \u201cShe stood in the woods day after day, demanding I talk to her, tell her where you were. After I gave in and talked to her, we ended up in business together. I\u2019ll let her explain that when she wakes up, though.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019m glad that you two are friends. Jenna too?\u201d Gormund  asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, Jenna too.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow did you find me?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Elodie squinted with a hint of mischief. \u201cI knew you were special, so I allowed a part of my spirit to be bonded to yours. If you are ever in danger, I will know.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhy are you here, though? Isn\u2019t it a long way from home?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt is. Gormund, when I realized you were getting close to the Isle of Desires, I knew I had to warn you. As long as I was coming, there was no reason not to bring her along.\u201d Elodie snorted smoke from her nostrils. \u201cThe island is dangerous. It will play with your perceptions, feeding your desires until you are trapped in a waking dream, never to leave. If you must go ashore, please be careful. I can\u2019t go there, as the spirit of the island is too strong for me this far from my mountain.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThank you for the warning and thank you for bringing Lidia.\u201d Gormund saw the orc starting to wake up and knelt next to her. \u201cWill you stay here tonight?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI thought that was obvious,\u201d Lidia said, while Elodie answered, \u201cNo, it is too cold for me here. I must return home. I will let Jenna know you are here safe.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThank you,\u201d Gormund and Lidia both replied.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With that, Elodie surprised everyone by diving into the ocean, only to come shooting up from beneath the surface. No sooner had her tucked wings broken the water\u2019s surface than she spread them and began pumping herself skyward to return to the east.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lidia had recovered enough to stand with Gormund\u2019s assistance. \u201cI brought dried fruit. Point me to the kitchen and I can make some tartlets.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat? In the kitchen? What a strange place for that.\u201d Gormund tried to brush his unruly hair from his face. \u201cWe, uh, don\u2019t have those, but I have a pot in my chamber you can use.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lidia looked at Gormund confused for a moment. \u201cOh! No, not toilet, tartlets<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow about I show you? It\u2019s a sweet treat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOkay.\u201d Gormund looked to Mikka. \u201cCan she use the gallon \u2026 gal-thing \u2026 kitchen?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mikka laughed. \u201cAye, I can have someone show her to the galley. And I can find her a berth \u2014 that\u2019s a place to sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, uh,\u201d Gormund looked between the two of them. \u201cIf she wants, she can sleep in my bed. But only if she wants.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lidia gave Gormund a kiss on the cheek. \u201cYes, Gormund the Sweet. I was hoping you\u2019d say that.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOf course,\u201d Mikka said, \u201cit\u2019s a bit late to start now, but the cook fires up the oven at three bells of the middle watch for the day\u2019s baking, and you\u2019ll be able to bake your treats then. For now, I\u2019ll have the ship\u2019s boy show you where the galley is, then show you to the ship-master\u2019s cabin. If that\u2019s all, Gormund?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, right. I\u2019ll let you get back to captain stuff and go clean up my room.\u201d Gormund returned to his cabin and looked for anything out of place. He didn\u2019t have much, but he made sure everything was neat and tidy. His belt with scabbard and coin purse hung from a hook on the wall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He remembered the wash basin and dumped the dirty water out the window into the sea. Putting the basin back, he saw himself in the dull mirror above it. His hair was every bit as wild as it had been when he first met Lidia and Jenna. There were a comb and brush that had come with the ship. He picked up the comb and tried to pull it through his hair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It stuck in a tangle, and he found himself unable to free the comb without painful pulling. He was  still struggling with it when Lidia came in. She closed the door behind herself. \u201cYou stuck?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI was trying to destrangle my hair,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s okay. I like doing it. She picked up the brush and sat at the head of the bed. Sit here and let me help.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He sat between her legs, and she began working on his hair. \u201cElodie exaggerated,\u201d she said. \u201cIt took her less than a week to come out to the woods where I was yelling for her. I knew where to look, because her magic made all the crops grow overnight. The closer to her, the taller they were.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She managed to work the comb free and kept working. \u201cThe farmers needed hands at an odd time of year and didn\u2019t have money to hire them. Since Jenna and I had plenty, thanks to you, we gave the farmers loans. The out-of-season crops made their money back, plus our interest, plus a tidy profit for the farmers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe more we talked with Elodie, the more we realized we had a business opportunity. All those  farmers needed somewhere safe to keep their money and nowhere is safer than a dragon\u2019s home. So, Jenna, Elodie, and I started the Mountain\u2019s Tail Bank.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cElodie keeps the money safe and gets a cut, which she promptly spends on jewels, and she created a sort of hidden portal in the woods to her cave. Some of the best-looking mint grows there. She says you did that.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI just gave her the seeds. She used her magic to make it grow. It sounds like a lot happened with you since I left.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lidia giggled. \u201cWith me? You\u2019ve got yourself a ship.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t mean to, but it\u2019s helping me follow the setting sun and moons.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSo true. The crew has a new name for you; Gormund Dragon-Friend.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, at least it\u2019s right this time. I do have a dragon friend.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lidia hummed as she worked on his hair, and Gormund let himself be lulled to sleep. He woke in her embrace, more comfortable than he\u2019d been in more weeks than he could count.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He sat up and saw flour on her sleeve, and a sweet on a plate waiting for him on the table. It looked nothing like what she\u2019d said. Instead, it was a tiny pie and was delicious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund met the captain on the deck and gave him a nod.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWe\u2019re going ashore today, lads,\u201d Mikka said. \u201cRemember what the dragon said. This island is dangerous. We\u2019ll be going in groups of four. If your fellows seem to be losing reality, get them back to the boats. Otherwise, we\u2019re looking for water, fruit, and maybe some fresh game. Launch the boats!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Three boats were lowered to the water, and each was manned by four crew, except the last which had four crew plus the captain and Gormund. The boats also hauled looped lines from the ship to the shore to allow pulling the empty barrels to shore and the filled barrels back to the ship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The island was small but covered in dense forest. Gormund pointed at the hills behind which they\u2019d watched the sun set the day prior. \u201cCan we maybe watch the sunset from up there today?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAye, for sure, Gormund. It\u2019ll take hours to fill the barrels for the next leg of the sail.\u201d Mikka made sure all the crews knew what they were meant to do and set off for the hills with Gormund at the lead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despite his size, Gormund moved through the brush with a smooth silence that came from years of surviving in the wilds. As they moved, he pointed out skeleton after skeleton among the  trees. He stopped after a short while to pick fresh kumquats and wild beans, offering some to Mikka.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThese are good,\u201d he said, holding up a bean, \u201cbut those will make you sick for days.\u201d He pointed to a nearby plant that looked almost identical.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can you tell the difference?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He picked a leaf from the edible beans and a leaf from the other. \u201cSee the drop shape at the end of this leaf? That\u2019s the tears you\u2019ll cry from being sick by it. That\u2019s how my nana explained it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They ate a snack of tangy kumquats and vaguely sweet beans. \u201cYou move like a drunken ox in the brush,\u201d Gormund said. \u201cIf you watch how I move, you can be Mikka the Silent. If you can\u2019t be quiet, you\u2019ll never be able to hunt.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mikka laughed. \u201cAye, lad. I\u2019ve never been one for hunting. My fortunes lay more with the sea than the land. You seem to be comfortable on both, though.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, the bed on the ship is very comfortable. The only thing that makes me uncomfortable is this dumb bag of coin that bangs against my leg all the time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhy did you bring it?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIn case this is where the sun and moons set. Then I\u2019ll be done with the ship and can give it to you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d Mikka stopped with a partially chewed bean in his mouth. \u201cYou\u2019re going to give me the ship? And then what? Swim home?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund popped a kumquat in his mouth and chewed it slowly. \u201cI forgot about that part. But I still plan on giving you the ship when we get where we\u2019re going.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They continued to the top of the hills and sat. \u201cI thought this island was dangerous,\u201d Mikka said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund shrugged. \u201cThe less danger you look for, the less you find.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cUnless it finds you,\u201d Mikka grunted. His face went blank, then he stood. \u201cYes, the ship.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund listened to the captain crashing back down the hill the way they\u2019d come. He thought Mikka might want to try to bag a hare and chuckled. \u201cYou\u2019ll scare all the game,\u201d he called out after him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A figure appeared to him on the hill. She looked like Lidia, but he knew it wasn\u2019t her. \u201cHi,\u201d he said. \u201cWho are you and why do you look like Lidia?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI am Lidia,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNope. You don\u2019t move like her, and you don\u2019t smell like her.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cClever.\u201d She changed her form to that of a small human woman with brown skin. \u201cWhat are you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI am Gormund, also called Simple Gormund, Slow Gormund, Gormund the Gormless. I like Simple Gormund the best though, but you don\u2019t have to actually say simple. Slow Gormund is silly, since I\u2019m very fast, and Gormless is even sillier, since I have a \u2018gorm\u2019 right there in my name.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI see.\u201d She leaned closer and stared into his eyes. \u201cWhat are you looking for, young man?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019ve been looking for a snipe for more years than I can count. Since I was seven. So, I\u2019ll keep going toward where the sun and moons set until I find one.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDon\u2019t you want wealth?\u201d she asked, showing him the hillside littered with gold coin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo. I have too many already. It\u2019s more than I can count, and it\u2019s heavy and bangs against my leg when I walk.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat about fame?\u201d The gold coins turned to adoring crowds cheering his name. \u201cAnd adoration?\u201d Scantily dressed women and men surrounded him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund shook his head hard. \u201cToo much detention. I don\u2019t like it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The crowds disappeared. She changed back to the form of Lidia. \u201cI know you like attention from  this one. I could be yours, Gormund. Don\u2019t you want me?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI like Lidia, but you aren\u2019t her.\u201d Gormund sighed. He stood and turned to go back down the hill but stopped for a moment and poured out the contents of his coin purse in front of her. \u201cThank you for the fruits and water from your island. I hope that\u2019s enough for it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With that, he headed back down the hill where he found Mikka and the crew standing stock still in a trance. The barrels had already been pulled back to the ship but none of the crew were getting into  the boats.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund picked each one up and put them in the boats. He tied each one to the haul line and signaled for the hands on the ship to pull them in. He climbed into the last boat and rowed back to the ship himself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The crew was pulled aboard by the hands still on the ship, including Lidia. She gave him a big hug and a kiss on the lips. \u201cAre you okay?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI, uh\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not under the island\u2019s spell too, are you?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cUh, no, just \u2026 you kissed me and I felt like my plate was all filled up.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re cute when you blush, Gormund.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mikka began to come around. \u201cHow did you avoid that?\u201d he asked. \u201cEvery little thought was turned into a fantasy. The illusion was so real.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, I was just thinking about Lidia, and she was there, but she wasn\u2019t. Didn\u2019t move right, didn\u2019t smell right. Smelled like poison oak. Other than that, all I thought about was the tiny pie and hoping there were more.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lidia laughed. \u201cThere\u2019s plenty more.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As soon as the crew had their wits back about them, they set sail around the island, leaving it far behind them before the sun set over the western sea. Gormund was sated on tartlets, enjoying the evening air with Lidia when Mikka approached him with a box.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cLet me see your purse, Gormund.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He handed the empty purse to the captain. \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe crew pulled together a reward for saving all of us on the island.\u201d Mikka poured mixed coins into Gormund\u2019s purse, to where it could barely close.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gormund groaned. \u201cBut I don\u2019t want\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt would be rude to refuse,\u201d Lidia said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t want to be rude,\u201d Gormund said, accepting the heavy purse with a sigh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mikka grunted. \u201cI saw an illusion that you were planning to give me the ship.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNot a delusion,\u201d Gormund said, \u201creal.\u201d He stood and took Lidia\u2019s hand, leading her to his cabin for the night.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

prompt: Start or end your story with an empty plate, empty glass, or something burning. available at Reedsy The plate in front of Gormund gave him a feeling he hadn\u2019t had before. The squash and …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[208],"tags":[216,210,209],"class_list":["post-2833","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-trunk-stories","tag-fantasy","tag-fiction","tag-short-story"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pxT7i-JH","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2833","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2833"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2833\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2834,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2833\/revisions\/2834"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2833"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2833"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.evardsson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2833"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}