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Um, uh, yeah, whatever

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Storm Season

prompt: Start or end your story with a character standing in the rain.

available at Reedsy

The rain came down in sheets. Having given up on keeping the rain from her eyes, Taylor McAllister stood unmoved as the deluge soaked her faster and more thoroughly than the shower stall in the cut-rate hotel. The gloom of the red dwarf sun hidden behind the thick clouds did nothing to lift her mood.

Summons were one thing, finding the executor of a will and notifying them … well, it never got easier. She never knew what to say beyond what her job required. Sometimes they had known it was coming and wept soft and silent. Other times it came as a total shock, resulting in outbursts and clinging to her as sobs tore through them.

She wasn’t certain, but it was likely that the person she was looking for wasn’t human. The will came from the estate of an orange, crab-like alien with a name that wasn’t pronounceable by humans, if the transliteration on the paperwork was anything to go on.

Whoever it was moved around a lot. This was the sixth “last known location” for them. At least this one was on the same moon as the last. She’d been through two planets, a station, a ship, and now this moon. Getting here at the start of the “storm season” was just one of those luck things, she guessed.

A bus stopped in front of her and the doors opened. Taylor stepped in, water pouring off her to disappear through the porous floor. “Does this route go by the Grenthouse Building?” she asked.

“Sure does,” the tall, blue-grey alien driver said. “You want me to let you know when it’s coming up?”

“That would be helpful.” She pulled out her comm to pay. “How much?”

“No charge in the city.” The doors closed behind her as the driver motioned for her to find a seat. “Crazy humans, could be making a lot more by charging for all rides, but whatever, I still get paid.”

“Sounds like us crazy humans are rubbing off on you a little.” Taylor sat in the first empty seat and felt a rush of warm, dry air from an overhead vent, even as any water she shed was pulled through the seat to somewhere she couldn’t fathom. It was as though every inch of the bus interior was designed to deal with dripping, soaked passengers.

Taylor watched the alien pilot the bus using a heads-up display on the windshield. Without it, nothing outside the bus would be visible through the deluge. She was contemplating how good the drainage systems had to be to account for the fact that since landing her shuttle at the port, she hadn’t seen a single puddle.

“Grenthouse Building, Sacker Street, next stop,” the driver called out.

Taylor stood to move to the door. She was almost dry, she realized, and her hands were tingling as the feeling came back to her cold fingers.

The bus stopped and the door opened. “It’s the next building down, on the other side of the street,” the driver said, pointing in the direction of her target.

“Thanks,” she said. She took a deep breath and stepped off the bus into the downpour, marching toward the building with purpose.

By the tenth step, Taylor was again soaked through to the skin. She stopped as the bus drove past her and crossed the street. She saw no sense in rushing, as it had no effect on how wet she would or wouldn’t be.

The building — like all the others she’d seen on this moon — had a dry entryway with an air curtain to keep out the rain and a strong down-draft that helped one shed the rain they carried with them. She pushed the button for flat 4-M. At least this one still had the name of the residence-hopping person she sought, “Pat Smith,” along with the other name on they were identified by on the paperwork, “#*//-+?:’!~.”

“Yeah?” The voice on the intercom sounded distinctly human, female, and either very tired or possibly intoxicated.

“I’m Taylor McAllister from AllWhere Services, looking for Pat Smith. I’ve got some important paperwork concerning, um, ‘asterisk, hash, plus, question-mark, question-mark, tilde, single-quote, dash, slash, colon, slash’ – I, uh, don’t know how to pronounce it.”

The reply was a series of clicks, pops, and ticks followed by, “What happened? Why are you looking for Pat Smith?”

“I’m, uh, trying to find the executor of his will.”

There was long moment of silence, followed by the door buzzing and opening. “Come up.” The voice on the intercom sounded choked.

Taylor followed the green lights on the floor to the lift, then off the lift at the fourth floor to door 4-M. Before she could knock, the door swung open.

“Come in.”

Taylor stepped in as the door closed behind her. She removed her jacket and looked for somewhere to hang it.

“There’s a hook on the door behind you, dear,” Pat said. “Do you prefer coffee or tea?”

Taylor hung her drenched jacket from the hook on the door and looked at the small woman standing in the corner kitchenette of the one-room flat. The woman had light brown hair, greying at the temples, pale green eyes, surrounded by the lines of years and shadowed with rings of sleeplessness, and a complexion of pale brown that spoke of too many years away from a generous sun.

She was in the act of pouring herself a mug of coffee, and Taylor said, “Coffee’s fine, since you already have it made.”

Pat poured a second mug, then picked up a bottle of whiskey and put a splash in her own mug. She held it up toward Taylor with a questioning look.

“Yeah, I could do with a drink.”

Pat placed the mugs on the small table in the center of the flat and sat on the single bed that also served as a couch. Taylor sat in the only chair and opened the case she’d been carrying and cleared her throat. “I, uh, know this is a difficult time for you, but I have—”

“Taylor, right?” Pat interrupted. When Taylor nodded, Pat continued. “I’m a retired probate lawyer so I know what’s involved. But Petey — that’s his human name — I’m at a loss. How … if you know, how did he…?”

Taylor pulled out the copy of the death certificate and handed it to Pat. There wasn’t anything to say, so she picked up her coffee and took a sip. The splash of whiskey was far more liberal than she’d expected.

Pat read the paper and set it down with a shaking hand. She took a sip from her cup, closed her  eyes for a moment, and a tear rolled down her cheek. “Petey, you were supposed to let me know.”

“I’m guessing you knew about his diagnosis, but not his choice for euthanasia?” Taylor asked.

“He was supposed to let me know what he decided, but then all contact stopped.” Pat wiped her tears with the back of her hand. “For Ketaikans like Petey, Tarok’s Syndrome is a slow decline into dementia, leading eventually to death. He was diagnosed about eight years ago, but he stopped responding to my comms last month.”

“I’m so sorry.” Taylor took a larger sip of the coffee. “How did you know … Petey?”

Pat drank more of her coffee. “I grew up in the Little Ketaik neighborhood of New Yelm, Mars. I was clicking and mandible popping right along with babbling. By the time I was a teenager, I was babysitting Miss May’s brood. Petey was the only male with eleven sisters, which is pretty typical for them.

“The girls pretty much took care of themselves, and they were already twice his size. He was kind of my favorite. Quiet, a little shy, and determined to speak English without a translator.” She finished her cup and took the three steps to the kitchenette to bring back the bottle of whiskey. She didn’t bother with the coffee at all, pouring half a mug of whiskey for herself, and topping Taylor’s mug with it.

“You kind of watched him grow up, then?”

Pat nodded. “He didn’t think he had a chance to be anything but someone’s trophy breeder. I convinced him he was more than that, and he took it to heart.

“He made it through law school, passed the bar, and came to work for me thirty years ago. When I retired, he took over the practice.”

“Did you know he selected you as his executor?” Taylor took another sip of the now mostly-whiskey coffee.

“No. It doesn’t surprise me, though.” She sniffled. “He was supposed to be my executor. Now I’ll  have to change it, I guess.”

Pat read through the stack of papers in silence as they drank. When she finished, she stacked them all neatly and signed the receipt. “He made it easy for me,” she said. “Everything’s air-tight, no debt, a solid choice to take over the practice, and all his liquid assets go to the university hospital in New Yelm for TS research.”

Pat stood and opened the big window. The rain continued to sheet down, the smell of ozone and petrichor wafting through the flat. “I miss you, Petey.”

“I have to ask, did Petey ever manage to speak English without a translator?” Taylor asked.

“Yeah, but you have to listen close, kind of like a parrot.” Pat flopped down on the bed. “I don’t know about you, but I’m drunk. If you want to sleep here tonight, feel free.”

Taylor stood and felt the floor sway under her before collapsing back into the chair. “Yeah, I think I’ll just sit here for a while.”

“No problem. It reclines, if you want.”

Taylor looked out at the rain. “How long does storm season last?” she asked.

Pat laughed. “Is that what they told you at the port? This is just a normal day.”

“It rains like this all the time?”

“Mostly.”

“Why here? You?” Taylor asked.  “I mean, why would anyone want to live here? Sorry, I blurt when I’m drunk. That’s not normal whiskey.”

“It’s not. It’s a bottle that Petey gave me when I retired. A special reserve, 140 proof from somewhere in Scotland.” Pat sighed. “Seemed appropriate.”

“Sorry, again.”

“It’s fine. As to why, well, the Aquilarians — the tall, thin, blueish guys — love it; reminds them of home. For me, it’s cheap, and all I can afford these days. I spent my retirement savings on research into TS. It was worth it, though. That research produced the drugs that kept Petey going for the last year and a half, long after he would’ve been gone without it.”

Trunk Stories

One Free Lesson

prompt: Write a story starring an octogenarian who’s more than meets the eye.

available at Reedsy

Andres started the morning of his eightieth birthday the same way he started most of his mornings. He dressed, made sure his keys were in his pocket, grabbed his cane, and walked the mile to the cemetery where he sat in silence, leaning on his wife’s headstone.

Rather than heading straight home for some breakfast, however, he decided to treat himself. He caught the bus into town; free for all riders over sixty. The drivers hadn’t asked for his ID in at least the last five years.

Once in the shopping area around the bus depot, he walked past the chain diner advertising all its senior discounts and went to the locally owned diner that connected to a bar that would open in a few hours.

The bar and diner were known as seedy by some, as the only neutral ground in which to conduct business by others. Andres chose a booth in the corner, where he had a view of the diner, the entry, and the connecting door to the bar. He sat at the outside edge of the bench seat, rested his cane next to him, and adjusted his belt. 

He waved off the menu offered by the young woman waiting tables. “I’ll have the half-portion chicken-fried steak with sourdough toast, black coffee, and water, please.”

“I’ll get that started for you right away, sir,” she said.

Andres hadn’t been in the diner in at least a decade, but it seemed that nothing had changed, beyond the grime being more deeply ground into the linoleum tiles and, of course, the staff. They were all too young to have worked anywhere back then.

The steak was also unchanged, with paprika in the sausage milk gravy, and the hash browns cooked right to the edge of burnt without going over. The sourdough was different, or he thought it was, at least. He could’ve just been remembering it as more sour than it was.

He took his time with the meal, watching other diners come and go. He recognized most of them — not as individuals but as players in the world from which he’d retired. He didn’t pay much attention to the ones he could pick out easily by their clothing or behavior, but focused more on those who left him wondering.

Anyone he could suss out at a glance was not likely to be a threat, but those that struck him as being a civilian he paid closer attention to. It wasn’t an attempt at surveillance, just noticing things, as he’d done all his life. The guy in the courier windbreaker with the backpack — slung to allow quick access; there was something long in the backpack, and he’d left the courier pouch on the bike outside. He was too obvious.

The young woman that parked a motorcycle out front and came in calling for eggs, toast, and coffee, though — he couldn’t tell for sure. To Andres, she stuck out by not sticking out. Anywhere other than here, she’d blend right in, but she seemed too comfortable for a civilian in this environment.

It meant either that she was oblivious, or very good. He kept a sliver of his attention on her, as the “courier” grabbed a to-go bag and dropped it into his backpack where Andres saw the pistol-grip of a short shotgun. The motorcycle girl talked with the waitress for a moment before looking around the diner.

The crowd had been building, and there were no empty tables. She approached his booth. “Excuse me, sir. May I join you?” she asked.

Andres nodded, and she sat in the center of the bench opposite him. Again, she was either oblivious or confident enough in her abilities or position to put herself in a less-than-optimal position. She set her helmet on the table next to her.

Her food arrived a moment later, and she thanked the waitress before turning her attention to him. “Thanks for letting me sit here. My name’s Emily,” she said.

Andres nodded. “Nice to meet you, young lady. What brings you in?”

“Cheap breakfast, my roommate works here, and they let me park my bike right out front where nobody’ll mess with it. What about you?”

“Good chicken-fried steak. Thought I’d treat myself.”

He kept his left hand under the table as he ate with his right. He took time between bites. He was in no rush.

Emily wolfed down her eggs and went back to making conversation while she took her time with her toast and coffee. “What did you used to do — or still do — for work?”

“After Vietnam,” he said, “I had enough of the Army and just bounced around from job to job. You?”

“Mechanic,” she said, “at a bike shop.”

She could mean exactly what she said, or it could be a euphemism. The “bike shop” could be exactly that or have something to do with the outlaw bikers that had moved into town, twenty years earlier.

While he was thinking about the bikers, one of them walked in. A giant of a man openly wearing his colors, with a one-percent patch on his chest. He waved at the waitress and walked straight for Andres’ booth, where he pushed the woman to the inside of the bench and sat beside her.

“Imagine that,” he said. “I get to meet the ‘Left Hand of the Nikolaev Family’ in the flesh.”

“There is no such thing,” Andres said, “as the Nikolaev Family or any Left Hand.”

“Don’t be so modest,” the biker said. “Just because Niko’s gone, doesn’t mean you are.”

“Let him be, Fang. He’s just an old Vietnam vet having breakfast,” Emily said.

“Sorry, sister, but he used to be the number one triggerman for the Russian mob around here, before we got rid of them and took over.” Fang leaned forward. “Now he’s just a washed-up old man.”

Andres took a sip of his coffee. “You at least got part of it right. I’m just an old man.”

“Andres ‘Trigger’ Petrenko,” Fang said, leaning back, “I owe you for at least half a dozen brothers you did back in ’02. You was old even then.”

“You must be mistaken,” he said. “I think any old man you went to war with twenty years ago would be dead by now.”

“I should just beat you to death right here.”

“I have no doubt you could do that,” Andres said, “but if I’m who you think I am, why would I let you get close enough to?”

Fang whipped out a knife and started to rise when a pop like a loud firecracker rang out and he stopped, falling back into the seat, the knife dropping to the table where Andres swept it on to the floor.

Andres reached into his pocket, pulled out a hundred-dollar bill, and placed it under his plate. Fang was cursing and groaning, while Emily was doing her best to stuff napkins against the wound to stop the bleeding.

Andres noted that no one in the diner wanted to get involved, which was all to the better. “That, son, is a gut shot. Hurts like hell, I know. You’re going a little grey there. What you’re feeling now, is shock. You’ll survive…most likely. If you or any of your brothers come at me again, you won’t. Understand?”

Fang responded only with more curses and groans.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” He stood, holstering the suppressed pistol he’d held in his lap while he ate, and grabbed his cane. “This is your one free lesson, son. Fear the old man in a profession where men die young.”

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We/I

prompt: Write a story where a character is experiencing parallel realities.

available at Reedsy

Something happened in the lab the other night. I’m not certain what but it was something.

I powered up the device, and there she…I…the other I…was. It was a possibility I hadn’t considered. By opening a door into a parallel universe, I opened the door to myself in that same universe.

Some clarification first. My name is Samuel Worth, I am a thirty-four-year-old physicist that likes doing stupid experiments in my garage. I go by Sam. Her name is Samantha Worth, a thirty-four-year-old physicist that likes doing stupid experiments in her garage…she goes by Sam.

One difference at our conception, or possibly even sooner. We look too alike to have a wildly different selection of genes from our mother and father. We knew, in an instant. Until the age of twelve, we looked identical.

I’d been called “girlish” when I was a child, she was called a tomboy. Right up until puberty hit us hard. We shared an awareness of our entire lives up to that point.

She reached out a hand, both of us unsure of what might happen. I reciprocated and our hands touched. At that moment, the machine powered down. My consciousness divided itself between two worlds, without severing the connection.

The following morning, he/I had to sit down to pee, because it was too confusing to try to do things differently than she/I. By the time we/I had finished breakfast and a cup of coffee, it was becoming easier to manage both of my selves at once.

Driving was probably dangerous, so we/I took public transportation to the university. We/I didn’t have any lectures today but had to maintain office hours.

“Dr. Worth? I have a question about the math behind Bell’s Theorem.”

He/I looked up at Caleb. He was a good kid, quiet, reserved, perhaps a little slow. In university on a swimming scholarship, did well in nationals, and hoped for a shot at the Olympics. Not the sort you’d imagine going for a physics degree, but he never stopped trying his damndest. He/I settled into going over the math with Caleb, when she/I was interrupted.

“Dr. Worth? Can you help me with this proof? I think I missed something.”

She/I looked up at Chloe. She was a “bad girl” type…at least, she tried to act that way. Not the sort you’d imagine going for a physics degree, unless you got to know her. Under the torn jeans, tattoos, hot pink mohawk, and acidic tongue hid a sharp mind.

We/I had a moment of panic, realizing we/I had just spent several uncomfortable seconds in a sort of fugue. “Sorry,” we/I said, “it’s been a strange day.”

For some reason that is still unclear to us/me, she/I and he/I changed places. She/I came up with a new approach to explain the difficult parts to Caleb, to help him grasp it, while he/I pored over Chloe’s proof, finding an arithmetic error in the midst, and helping her rework it from that point forward.

We/I finished the day with a fresh pot of coffee in the garage, trying to restart the device. By working from opposite ends, we/I was able to troubleshoot in half the time it would have taken otherwise.

The fact of the matter was, there was nothing wrong with the device. It just refused to start. Power levels in and out, and amperage drain on the circuit all pointed to it still running, but…nothing.

Even after unplugging the power supply, the device still showed current flowing through the circuits consistent with being powered on. The pot of coffee long since empty, we/I prepared for bed.

In front of the sink, we/I looked into the mirror. The same eyes, the same fine lines around them, the same hairline, but a masculine and feminine form both visible in the mirror. It was strange, and perhaps even more unnerving than the awareness of being two versions in two universes simultaneously.

We/I called the university and had our/my TAs take over lectures for the rest of the week. Every waking minute was spent in the garage, trying everything to reset the devices. We/I finally decided to destroy them. Break them down to unusable debris and never attempt this experiment again.

As the week went on, we/I felt our link growing weaker. She/I and he/I could still sense one another, but it was as though our local consciousness was again taking the forefront.

The final memories we/I had together were on Saturday evening. She/I was in a diner he/I usually frequented, while he/I was in a bar where she/I was a semi-regular.

Chloe left the booth where her similarly tattooed and pierced friends were laughing boisterously and approached. “Dr. Worth? I thought you said chicken and waffles sounded disgusting.”

“It wouldn’t be fair to dismiss it without empirical evidence. And I’m off work; call me Samantha, or Sam.”

“What’s the verdict, Sam?”

I smiled. “It’s fantastic. Just the way I remembered from another universe.”

Chloe laughed. “You’ll have to tell me about that some time.”

“Nope.”

“And, how you plan on traveling to another universe.”

Caleb entered the bar with other members of the swim team. “Come on, guys. Quit trying to hook me up. I just want to have a beer then go back to the dorms and study.”

He saw me at the bar and approached. “Dr. Worth! I never see you here.”

“Hey, Caleb. I’m off work, call me Samuel, or Sam.”

“Well, Doc—Sam, I didn’t take you for the wine type.”

I swirled the glass of red and took another sniff. “I remembered enjoying this in another universe,” I said.

“Is it as good in this one?”

“It is.”

“Do you think it’s actually possible to travel to another universe?” he asked.

We/I began explaining to Chloe and Caleb how the universe is well within the Schwarzschild radius for the amount of mass present, and how that presents the possibility that the universe itself has an event horizon we are well inside.

It was some time during that explanation that I no longer felt my other self, and suddenly felt very alone.

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ALCAN and hardware don’t mix

Well, it seems that I am doing what I said I never would – blogging from my iPhone. It seems that somewhere along the way the wireless card in the MacBook Pro got shaken too vigorously and now, while I can connect I am averaging a throughput of somewhat less than normal. It seems to connect at no more than 360 bytes (no, not kilobytes) and spends much of its time idling at 0. So it is off to the Mac store I go…

More as I have news.

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Hosting solved

During the move this site and talkingfox.com will be hosted by HostGator. While the initial setup was a bit tricky (changing paths, relying on php errors to tell me what the paths actually were, etc) I managed to get it up and running.

Since my wife didn’t keep copies of her mail locally her mail “disappeared” when the DNS switched over. I will probably alter her hosts file long enough to pull all the mail off the server and cache it locally so that she can respond to a few she had lined up.

After that it is a matter of switching our mail readers to point to the right (new) server for the interim and then changing everything back once we are relocated and settled.

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Moving (and possibly down for a while)

Ok, everyone already knows we are moving back to the lower 48. This means, of course, that this site and talkingfox.com will both be down during the transition. Unless, that is, I can find a reasonable price on one month of hosting. Just to throw the blogs and email up and point the DNS there during the move. If not, expect this site to be down from the 22nd of this month until sometime around the first week of June.

More later.